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People gave in some extra time doing their hair in the morning, they came in with their notepads waiting for abouna Anthony to give suggestions or maybe list some names or something like that. Our goal in this series is to really see the idea of dating leading to marriage. So the whole idea of courtship and dating from a Godly perspective and see what it is that God wants from us and what God expects of us.
That's ok too because we're going to cover the broad spectrum of topics when it comes to this. But like I said, we'll try to see things from a Godly perspective.
One time I was giving a talk about marriage and I was saying… you know when you go to the hardware store or the toy store "Fr anthony messeh dating" something like that and you buy stuff?
Marriage is not intuitive, marriage is not easy. Marriage is not a natural
Fr anthony messeh dating that you can be good at just randomly or by accident. The only way to have a good marriage and with all relationships, but especially in marriage is that there is a lot of assembly that goes in and a lot of work that goes into it. The work and assembly that goes into a good, God-pleasing marriage and satisfying marriage starts much much earlier, even as early as dating and courtship.
That thing will come back to bite you in the end. But before we jump in, let me get a feel of my audience right here. Raise your hand if you are married. Raise your hand if you are single. Raise your hand if you are single and actively looking. Ok, I got a few hands! Everyone is looking for The One. I get to know stuff and I may know a few stuff that is going on right now that not everyone else knows is public information!
You can just tell from the look in her eye what it was that happened today. Everyone dreasms of that day. I truly believe that. Just trust me, stick with me on this one and let me explain myself. I tell this to all couples when we do this premarital counseling: Why do we work so hard in premarital counseling and why do we talk so much about dating and doing it the right way?
Well you can see where this is going to go in marriage. You always
Fr anthony messeh dating me in public!
The scary thing is how every marriage starts off the same way but then they seem to go in lots of different directions. But I hope you can see that marriage is a risk.
And yeah, the person may appear like this today and may appear like this tomorrow but like I said, ask the married people in the room. Dating is not an accurate picture.
Let me tell you what SOME people do. Some people decide to play it safe and just be really really really picky. And test things a lot before they take one step. What you see is that everyone seems to be looking for the one, but what stuck out in that video clip is that there seems to be a lot of confusion as to how to find the one.
And what that confusion has done is this: Do you agree with that statement or disagree? In the world that we live in, we get so used to the UNDO button.
The current model for dating that exists in our society is not one that has been around for hundreds and hundreds of years. The way it used to be maybe like some of our parents did in Egypt was that there was a more formal courtship: That the system of dating is something which is recent, and you know what else is recent?
What also coincides with that last years or so? There has never been a "Fr anthony messeh dating" like it is today when marriages are just so unsuccessful. That the dating model changed and the success of marriage changed? This is how we learned how dating is supposed to be. But that model of dating needs to at least be questioned. Have marriages ever been worst? Have divorces ever been higher? Has there ever been so much adultery outside of marriage? Forget marriage, the life of singles has been destroyed by this dating methodology as well.
And even an atheist can look around at the world today and say that this model of dating is not a very very good one. There has to be a better way to do it. Stick Fr anthony messeh dating the Wonder Years ways, stick with the Saved by the bell way. Look at Proverbs 4: So before you follow that road, look at the destination. Is that where I want to be?
Is that the end that I want to have in my Fr anthony messeh dating There has to be a better way. There has to be a higher standard. There has to be something better than this nonsense that we see around us.
And the good news is…that there is. The bible does have principles on relationships and especially marital relationships that we can extract out to see how this dating model should go. But do you know the hardest thing to believe?
Is that God has a better plan, not for you but for ME. That God does have better. We talk about a better path because we want a better destination. One of the best promises in all the bible. All the needs that you have in life will be supported by his riches.
The bank can pay all my debts really really easy. You want to know what causes problems in marriage? One of the two partners has taken their eyes off God. This promise says that God will supply all your needs, but when there are problems in marriage it usually happens where I meet the other person, I love the other person, the other person is perfect, the other person is the best, the other person is this or that and then the honeymoon finishes and then real life hits.
Your spouse is very very important, but they can at best be number two. Look at the following verse and I want you to think…. Can you say this to your spouse? Can any spouse give that to you? No human being can give this to you, only Jesus can. Your spouse is not supposed to meet your needs, you know what your spouse is?
Your spouse is the icing on the cake. Said another way, pursuing marriage more than pursuing God is idolatry. It has become marriage.
It can also be that way Fr anthony messeh dating marriage if you hold your spouse higher than God.
There are people I know who cannot live without a relationship, or pursuit of a relationship. They have to be either in a relationship or pursuing one.
And as soon as that one finishes they have to get another one. Now all of you hopeless romantics are probably going to start throwing things at me right now…. Love is not enough for marriage! How can he say that? That was back in the 80s…. This is what TV teaches, and this is what music teaches and this is garbage. This is why marriages stink. This is the bad fruit of the dating system because we believe that love is enough. Love is not enough.
You know in the bible where it gives commands, Ephesians 5 gives commandments to Fr anthony messeh dating husband and to the wife on how to have a successful marriage. For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body.
Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Ladies…is that an easy command? So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself.
THE RIGHT PERSON MYTH - Adventures in Love, Sex & Dating Part 1. July 20. Fr. Anthony Messeh. Ask Me Anything - HALLOWEEN. THE TALK - Adventures in Love, Sex & Dating Part 4.
August 9, Fr. Anthony Messeh. So proud to be part of a church that is doing this. Real Talk Adventures in Love, Sex & Dating – Part 6. Video; Audio. Originally Recorded: Coptic Orthodox Mission Church · Speaker: Fr.